Thinking For Yourself is a flash non fiction/fiction essay hub for open minds and hearts.

What I give you is flash nonfiction/fiction, my original photographs, montages or stand alone, with or without words. All pieces are small and perfectly formed so you can tuck these offerings into your life pocket, no heavy baggage.

Why me and now?

Actually Thinking for Yourself is about you; more a conversation and belonging to a community that does not accept the status quo as fact or tired cultural narratives. We Think for Ourselves, with respect as open minds open lives. A light in the hall that makes coming home to you to the hub a place where you can be you.

Yet life does shape us all, and the below is a flavour of my background that led me to gradually Think for Myself, or the aboutness of Lucy. I accept what was, is and what might be, with a smile and lashings of compassion.

I am mad, manky, and an oh-so-hyper sensitive human. With chronic pain and a neuro-diverse brain, life literally and metaphorically hurts. A veritable embarrassment of riches when it comes to chronic health syndromes; Hyper-mobile Ehlers-Danlos, dislocated joints, spontaneously fracturing toes and feet, (who knew you could be allergic to gravity), compromised organs, and multiple design faults that leave medics baffled. Recurring cancer, multiple surgeries that weaken and a plethora of funky scars. No wonder my blood pressure goes rogue. Arthritis, crumbling bones, such is the glamour! An interesting selection of crutches to suit every occasion and a nippy electric scooter, my batmobile, my freedom buggy. The old brain? Roll up, roll up Dyscalculia, Dyslexia, late diagnosis ADHD, all as real and life-altering as any chronic physical condition. Cherry on top, treatment for PTS.

Equally I am an optimist and a joyful adovcate of us humans and this sapphire jewel of the earth. As a superfan of having your cake and eating it, you will not be surprised that I am a non-binary feminist and bi-sexual. I am courageous, ridiculously resilient, empowered and I can shine with an effervescent, playful, and light energy.

I find other humans a struggle puzzle. Internalised shame? Lovers are more skirmishes, and rare. With gradual awareness and a dose of hindsight I can see how my neurodiversity and a hyperactive body led to living with a dark and demanding interior world, and/or frozen denial, unsafe places, wasted money on doomed projects, schemes and impulsive random purchases. Drawn compulsively to abusive or equally dysfunctional people, all hidden from others and employers by isolation and destructive coping mechanisms. My body is always highly reactive, sensitive and leaves me in constant flux.

These are the artifacts of my curious self. But they do not define me as paradoxically the greater the multiple practical restrictions and losses, the more freedom I am discovering within myself that shapes how I experience and interpret life.

Within myself I can roam with fear, fervour, fun, look afresh with a curious mind and eye with the tilt my head, find the unexpected. Champion the magic of the mundane, surf the crest of awe, be raging, overwhelmed, frantic, too much, and start all over again. Happy to be proven wrong, excited about new ways of thinking and living.

I can’t promise I will publish on the same day at the same time each week due my naturally unpredicatble self and content will vary, eclectic in form and tone.

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Cheers!

Lucy Morley Williams